I love hip hop, the music is cool. Some of the fans, though, not so much. In this list I’m counting some of the ways that hip hop heads are irritating, maybe seeing this list will make them stop being annoying. Hopefully.

When debating about the best rapper ever

Why can’t Tupac, Notorious B.I.G, Jay Z and Andre 3000 all be great rappers – at the same time? Why should there be only one? As in any other genre, can’t we accept that fans have personal favourites; that you don’t have to fight to the death if someone else likes a different rapper?

When hearing a very cool verse or beat

When a hip hop head enjoys a verse, everyone and their mama will know about it. If you hear a random “Yeah son! That’s what I’m talking about!”, it’s probably because a hip hop head just heard a great beat. Why we all have to hear about it, no one will ever know?

When their favourite artist goes “mainstream”

A hip hop head’s least favourite thing is to have their favourite rapper recognised by the masses. Bizarrely, they see a rapper making money and being recognised for their work as some sort of betrayal. Ever heard a fan say, “Well, I personally liked Kendrick Lamar when he was still K-Dot”? No one cares, dude. Not one.

When the top 10 lists are revealed

I love hip hop and get a little sad when my favourite rapper doesn’t get a mention in a list. What separates me from the hip hop head is that I can move on. Hip hop heads don’t take this “transgression” lightly: They fill our timelines with rants about who should have been number one.

When they start emulating their favourite artists

I will admit that I’ve also copied a rapper’s look, like the longer length T-shirts Kanye started wearing. But love turned to hate when I saw every other guy dressed the same. It made me want to bang my head against the wall. And there are some looks that just don’t work on anyone but the artist. Only Cassper can rock the long ponytail. Everyone else, please stop.

The slang

“Cava”, “value”, “mami game”, “swag”, “turnt”, “trippin”. Wait… what?! This is hip hop head slang. Slang is fun and shows you’re hip, but when no one understands what you’re saying, it may be time to loosen up on the slang. Also because you are annoying.

Written by: @AsandaGura

Feature image, illustrated by Oratile Mothlabane